Time You Enjoy Wasting Is Not Wasted Time

I got the idea for this story from the latest recalls of Dora toys due to lead paint.

*Scene opens with Dora the Explorer looking for Boots the Monkey*

Dora *looking around*: Where is Boots? *calling* Boots!!

*Boots enters looking sick*

Boot: Oh, Dora. I don’t feel well. My mommy said I have lead poisoning because all of my toys had lead paint on them.

Dora: Oh Boots, I’m sorry you’re sick. Why did your toys make you sick?

Boots: My toys were made in China where they can pay someone less than a dollar a day to make toys. But in China they have no safety oversight and they used lead paint because it was cheaper.

Dora: We need to do something about that!

Boots: But I don’t know where to go to stop this.

Dora *looking at the camera*: Who do we ask for help when we don’t know which way to go? The Map! Right! Say Map!

Boots and Dora: Map! Map!

*Camera switches to the Map emerging from the Backpack. Map sings his annoying song and then displays a path*

Map: I know which way to go! Tell Dora she needs to go to the Corporate Boardroom, then to Washington DC, then to the people of America. Remember, Boardroom, Washington, People of America!!

Dora *to the camera*: Where do we have to go?

*Pictures appear at the bottom of the screen, depicting a Boardroom, Washington DC, and the People*

Dora: Boardroom, Washington, People of America. Let’s go Boots!

*Boots is too sick to run and dance with Dora, so Dora pushes Boots in a wheelchair to the Corporate Boardroom*

Corporate CEO: What are you doing in my boardroom?!? Security!

Boots: *coughs*

Dora: But sir, my friend Boots is very sick because your company outsourced all toy manufacturing to China where they have no worker’s rights and use toxic materials to make toys!

CEO: *laughs* Does your monkey friend own any stock in my company?

*Dora shakes her head no*

CEO: Silly girl, I only care about what makes money for my stockholders. They don’t care what we do as long as it maximizes our profits in the short term. You see, American workers expect to be paid a living wage, and the government expects us to use safe materials in our toys. By exporting our manufacturing to China we can produce our toys for much less. But we can still charge as much as we were when we made them in the States. So that means more profit for us!

Dora: But Mr. CEO you are making people sick and hurting American working class families. What happened to Worker Pride and Quality Workmanship?

CEO *opens locked safe*: I keep those locked away where they can’t bother me.

*Swiper the Fox music plays*

Dora: Did you hear that? That sounded like Swiper the Fox.

Boots: *coughing* That sneaky fox is always trying to swipe our stuff!

Dora: If you see the fox, yell Swiper!

*Swiper sneaks in, hiding behind the CEO*

Dora and Boots : SWIPER NO SWIPING! SWIP-

CEO *Interrupting*: Hold on a minute!

*Swiper takes Worker Pride and Quality Workmanship and throws them off-screen*

Swiper: You’re too late! You’ll never find them now!

CEO: Well, I’m glad to be rid of them, they were always getting in the way of making a quick buck.

*Security enters and throws Boots and Dora out of the building*

Dora: Well, we weren’t able to help Boots there. Where do we need to go next? Washington DC, right!

*Dora pushes Boots in the wheelchair to Washington DC*

Politician: Who let this child and animal into my office?

Dora: Ayudame por favor! Help me please! My friend Boots is very sick because of the lead paint on his toys made in China.

Politician: Big business has spent a lot of money keeping me in office, so I need to help them out as best I can. It would be bad for their profits if they had to pay American workers to produce quality toys. It’s better for all of us if we keep things the way they are.

Dora: But it’s not better, my friend is very sick!

Politician: Oh I didn’t mean all of us as in everyone. I meant all of us as in myself and my friend the CEO. And anyway, where are your parents. Letting you wander around with a sick animal. I better have CPS investigate. And were speaking Spanish? Are you even in this country legally? DHS will have to look into this as well.

*Dora quickly pushes Boots out of the office*

Boots: OH NO! Now I’ll never get better! And more kids will get sick too!

Dora: Don’t worry Boots, we can still appeal to the People of the USA!

Dora *Facing the camera*: YOU! Stand UP! Stand UP! We need to save Boots! Stop watching TV! Write a letter to the corporate boards, write a letter to your congressman, write a letter to your newspaper! If you all make your voices heard we can make this country a better place. A place where we can take pride in ourselves. Where you can earn a living wage and raise a family. Where you can have affordable health care. Where we don’t have to worry about hazardous toys being sold to our kids for the sake of a quick profit. YOU can make a difference! HEL-*static*

*Sorry this transmission has been stopped by the DHS. Please go back to your regularly scheduled viewing*